Exercises in situational awareness

Required equipment: One (1) kitten. One (1) kitchen.

Exercise 1: While kitten is between roughly 8 and 12 weeks old, cook dinner. Awareness of the kitten’s position and expected movements must be maintained at all times. Stepping on the kitten indicates a failure to maintain proper situational awareness. If you are using the oven, additional care must be taken to ensure that the kitten does not jump or reach up to hot parts of the oven that are within its range (the open door, etc.).

Exercise 2: Around approximately 12 weeks old, the kitten will be able to jump onto the countertops unassisted. Cook again. In addition to the precautions from Exercise 1, note that the stovetop is at counter height, and that the burners are close enough to the edge that a leap from floor to stovetop will result in the kitten landing on a hot burner. Also note that most cooking involves using dangerously sharp implements such as kitchen knives while handling kitten bait (i.e., most types of food, especially anything involving dairy or meat). As in Exercise 1, any injury to the kitten indicates a failure to maintain proper situational awareness.

Apply the lessons learned in these exercises to your daily life, and to firearms safety.

(Guess what D’Artagnan started being able to do over the weekend.)


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